Her name was Mia, a Great Dane rescue we were just supposed to be watching for two weeks. I spent three days nursing this sweetheart. Through all the growls, late night sips of water through a medicine dropper, and bribery via peanut butter sandwiches, I finally earned her trust.
I tried to keep myself guarded, knowing our time together was short, but all her teeth chattering, excited pounces and endless hours of snuggles shattered my resistance quickly.
Luckily, her new owners never came back. I nursed her to health and we became inseparable. She follows me everywhere; if I leave, she won't eat until I return, and when I get home, her happy jumpy face, with flirting ears and chattering teeth, has always been there to greet me.
Until now. Now she sits in intensive care. A routine spay turned into possible heart disease and we don't know if she's going to make it.
And I'm angry. I'm angry at the vets for not noticing her heart before they sent her home this morning. I'm angry at myself for not recognizing the serious problem until tonight. I'm angry that I spent too much time on homework when I should have been snuggling with my baby. I'm angry that I don't know how I'm paying for all this treatment. I'm angry at God for putting this in my path; he may know that I can handle this, but I don't think I can. And I'm really scared. Scared that the last image i'll have of her is her hooked up to all this machinery and whining to go home with me. I'm scared that she won't improve and I won't be able to pay for anything more. I'm scared that I failed her as an owner and mom.
Please pray for my baby girl's recovery. I honestly don't know what I'm doing right now. I miss her like crazy and am hoping against everything that she'll pull through and be home with us soon.